T-Shirt Hell : Newsletter : February 5th, 2007

da bears Football history was made this past Sunday as the Bears faced the Colts in Super Bowl XLI. And I'm not talking about the fact that the Super Bowl teams were led by black head coaches for the first time ever. I was referring to the fact that for the first time in Super Bowl history, it actually made sense when my stepfather shouted "That coach needs to go back to Africa!" right before throwing a beer bottle at the screen.

And who could forget those Super Bowl ads? My favorite ad was the one where Osama bin Laden eats a baby and wipes his ass with the Bible as he burns the American flag. It kind of makes you wonder what the people at Doritos were thinking.

In non-Super Bowl news, Microsoft finally released the highly-anticipated Windows Vista. Not to ruin the surprise, but I've heard that it includes a calculator. Also, Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro was recently put down. But don't weep for him. He's getting euthanized by angels now.

Lastly, don't forget that Valentine's Day is almost here. So to all you guys out there, be sure and remember to go buy some random piece of heart-shaped crap for $20 to reward the special lady in your life who never told you she stopped taking the pill.

Come one, come all, and marvel at our latest batch of new shirts! Your jaw will drop at the sight of the shirt that offends Jews. You'll question the existence of God after laying eyes upon a shirt that makes light of pedophilia.

We've also added shirts for liars, religious alcoholics, people that pose a threat to pregnant women, and anyone that would've made the most sensible choice on Gilligan's Island. Check out all those and many more.

All of our new shirts are here:

http://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/nsn/newshirt_020507_nsn.htm

division

Hounddog, a movie starring Dakota Fanning which depicts the brutal rape of a 12-year-old girl, recently debuted at the Sundance Film Festival and, as you can imagine, has caused quite a bit of controversy. Having seen this movie several times in a darkened theater with a vibrator and jar of Vaseline, I feel that it's my duty to give you a detailed review of the film and separate the controversy from the film itself.

Let me begin by saying that 'Hounddog' is the funniest movie I have seen since 'The Accused.' Dakota Fanning is much younger than Jodie Foster was at the time she made 'The Accused,' so right out of the gate you know the laughs are going to be stronger. But even aside from that, 'Hounddog' is a really solid movie. It's much better than all those movies that Shirley Temple got raped in.

And, of course, I can't review the movie without reviewing Fanning's performance. If I can't say anything else about this role, I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that rape has never been this cute. And, not to sound arrogant, but I think I really influenced her work here. We did a similar scene together in a movie I like to call 'Real Life.' We practiced that scene in an alley behind a Denny's for hours and hours. Since I don't have a penis I had to use an empty wine bottle that happened to be lying around, but Dakota didn't let that break the reality of the moment. She's a really dedicated actress. Even as she was shouting "Help!" and "Stop!" she wouldn't break character.

But let's get back to the controversy for a moment. My least favorite part of all this furor is that it's a big deal JUST NOW. I mean, I got raped in the movies my dad and I used to make together all the time, but I never got half the press that Dakota Fanning is getting. I'd like to add that if Dakota Fanning gets any awards for this film, I deserve the fucking lifetime achievement award. And if I do win, I'd just like to thank my father, two of my uncles, and seven guys from the Hollywood Foreign Press. It also reminds me that my friend Steve should have at least been nominated for an Emmy for his performance on Dateline's "To Catch a Predator."

phone home And those aren't the only examples. Nobody seemed to care when E.T. raped Drew Barrymore. Where was the controversy then? They probably kept it hush-hush just because E.T. was a Scientologist.

Another problem I have with all of this is that no one is mentioning all the good that can come of this movie. And I'm not talking about raising public awareness of abuse or any of that other bullshit. I'm talking about the fact that since Dakota Fanning portrays a female that gets raped as a child, it'll make her transition to stripping that much easier when her acting career dries up.

And finally, I can't believe no one has mentioned the one element of the movie that will really lead to violence. I'm talking of course about the Elvis soundtrack. When I hear Elvis music it makes me want to shove an icepick through my eardrum. I can't tell you how hard it was to cover my ears and masturbate at the same time. But all in all, I would say that 'Hounddog' deserves two thumbs up...and forced inside Abigail Breslin.

Comments (40) - View Comments - Add A Comment

Mike 02/07/07 6:23 pm

She was asking for it.

Kavinorum 02/07/07 10:37 pm

So they finally published Dakota's home movies? I will be sure to download this movie illegally, just like all the other rape movies...

Ax Crusnik 02/07/07 11:00 pm

E.T. is a scientologist? I should have known. The bastard.

RiDAH 02/07/07 11:07 pm

Ahhh, crazy White PEople.

Kathy 02/08/07 12:10 am

people out there support the war in iraq and on the other hand they bitch about these shirts. makes you kind of wonder where in the hell are their heads, besides up the presidents ass. for all of you that hate these shirts, get a life and quit going in the closet to look at these shirts, be a man or women and come out of the closet and hand out with the rest of all of us disfunctional people. i love your shirts, in a world full of fucked up stupid war we all need a laugh.

Sarah P. 02/08/07 12:39 am

I raped dakota.....i dont regret it and if she doesnt want to talk about it (like all the e-mails she responds to me with) then she wouldnt have made this movie......maybe i was right....she does love me!

Erik 02/08/07 5:57 am

Rape isn't a laughing matter, unless you're laughing while you rape, which I always do, by the way.

Diana 02/08/07 8:21 am

I am horribly offended by your comments regarding Elvis's music.

Also, I love you.

Cael 02/08/07 9:22 am

I've always thought Dakota Fanning and E.T looked very similar. Don't trust those eyes.

Derek 02/08/07 10:01 am

I dont think this is the first time shes been raped. Man On Fire, Denzel was a little too attatched to that little girl, must be tight though, cause he died for it

Stevie H 02/08/07 10:36 am

All the people talking about rape are messed up. I saved a girl from getting raped once. She was frantic, kicking and screaming at the top of her lungs, yelling FIRE, HELP, RAPE anything to get someone's attention. I have never seen anyone so scared, I' sure you are all wondering what I did....well. Fuck I stopped chasing her.

edw 02/08/07 11:39 am

He didn't rape Dakota, he made love to her. It was a sweet and sensitive moment.

the_d0g 02/08/07 12:39 pm

who else thinks Drew Barrymore was way hotter in ET than she was in Charlie's Angels?

Bruce 02/08/07 1:04 pm

That "Two Thumbs Up" move is called the Big Trouble in Little China. The "Big Trouble" being the first, and the "Little China" being the thumbs.

Bruce 02/08/07 1:05 pm

Fists*

How the fuck did I fuck that up?

lebowski 02/08/07 3:03 pm

how can you joke about raping a cute little girl like dakota fanning, you sick fuck...i almost puked it made me so sick.don't you realize that the movie would be much funnier if a sexy young boy was being forcibly cornholed. and isn't dakota in more than her fair share of movies already?i'm sure that hollywood is full of boy actors that could use the work.c'mon, lets see a little equality.

lebowski 02/08/07 3:07 pm

and another thing, this proves that hollywood is run by jews,if it was run by catholic priests, every movie would have a rape scene with little boys

Jerkins 02/09/07 12:03 am

I was very disappointed by the misleading title of this movie "Hounddog". I kept waiting for Dakota Fanning to be raped by a dog but sadly that scene never came.

Patser 02/09/07 1:28 am

Damn. You made me all moist and dripping. The rape stories and thumbs entering make me wanna.... yea... Yeah....... i'mmmm cumminnnggg.....

Sam 02/09/07 4:18 am

I raped Dakota before she was famous.

jacky 02/09/07 5:02 am

WAY too old for my tastes.

Mikey 02/09/07 5:28 am

Elvis has that effect on people. It makes me want to stick a gun up Dakota's pussy and pull the trigger over and over until I ejaculate so hard my balls get blown out of my nutsack.

Stephanie 02/09/07 9:42 am

It's one for the money, two for the show, some vasaline to get ready now go Dakota go!!!

sarah six 02/09/07 10:40 am

that shit about ET being a scientologist was fucking hilarious. you always keep me laughing with the unexpected.

peggy 02/09/07 11:25 am

your new pages looks cool & all but I can't read the left/red side.. & I always loved reading your hate mail..

Brenda 02/09/07 2:33 pm

I was a teen in Toronto when little emmanuel was raped and killed by some fucking jerks that I'd like to be alone with for 5 minutes in a locked room with a bat. I was raped downtown when I was 5 years old and my best friend bob was sodimized. Why would they want to make a movie and put a child through an ordeal like that.The producers are fucked. And by the way, I love your site.And i love your t shirts. If people cant handle them, then why would the fuckimg dummies go to your site.Thanks man. Keep up the good work. Sometimes when people get hurt or offended , you got to get over it. Fuck the sucks,Love ya.

Fishbelly the Magnificent 02/09/07 8:01 pm

Just thought I'd spread a little pedophilia humor.
What's the worst part about having sex with an 8 year old? Trying to wash the blood out of your clown suit!
What do you do after fucking a 12 year old?
Kill them.
What's the best part about having sex with a 12 year old girl in the shower?
YOu can slick back their hair and they look like a boy.
What's the best part about fucking twenty eight year olds?
There's twenty of them!!!!
And as my father used to say,
"Get 'em before the hair does"
"If there's not grass in the field, turn them around and play in the mud"

Private Jake 02/09/07 8:10 pm

If I'd found that rat bastard Sadam, I'd have killed him. I knew people whose job in Iraq entailed digging up some of the mass graves in which we found thousands of bodies...I'd have shot him in the fucking knee and then went jihad on his ass by strapping a bomb upon him and laughing as he begged for his life...No less than he'd done to his own people. You know, people who complain about what's on the tv or internet...F OFF. If you don't like what's on tv change the channel or if you find a website offensive, just don't visit the site again...Dumbasses!

Missey 02/09/07 8:25 pm

That is so true. I need both hands to masterbate as well.

Heather 02/10/07 1:54 am

Keep up the good work, guys! Your stuff is the funniest shit EVER!!!! :)

Jesus 02/11/07 11:57 pm

I'm mailing you a live kitten (in a jar) as a reward for your timely and wise comment....by the way Bob Barker is going to die within the month...get that press rollin!

Chris 02/12/07 10:41 pm

I don't find this funny at all. It use to be, in my day, that when a little girl was brutally raped she wasn't paid for it. Now a days, this young generation has to corrupt something as pure as pedophilia or rape. Money has taken control of everything. Im going to go do what I believe in. Mark my words, when you pay for rape it's just not rape anymore; it's prostitution. Im making my pro-rape/anti-prostitution stand now! Even poor homeless people should be able to enjoy a little bloody ass-raping.

don knotts 02/14/07 2:36 am

ah...i always end up smiling after I read your newsletter. and after i take a huge shit on a dying jew. almost but not quite as good.

DarkLiquid 02/14/07 11:52 pm

I like my women like I like my coffee. 12, naked and crying.

Yeah OK 02/15/07 4:41 pm

I will never understand what makes this funny. either Yall trying way too hard to be wierd and sick, or there is one person on here who actually does wanna rape Dakota. Whatever just because people dont like you doesnt mean you have to take it out on Dakota. Haha Yall B lunchin.

radna 02/19/07 6:22 am

Are there any Scientology shirts? Maybe I've missed them... But please, make some more about those idiots.

Ax Crusnik 02/20/07 4:23 pm

Yeah. There is one shirt that says "Xenu is my homeboy". But I agree that T-shirt hell should have a whole section of shirts that make fun of dipshit scientologists. They could just print pages from Hubbard's "Dianetics" on them. That shit is hilarious.

Beth-person-thinggy 03/10/07 4:55 am

Q: How do you make a 5 year old boy cry twice? A: Wipe your bloody dick on his teddy bear. Q: What's better than raping a 6 year old girl? A: If you figure it out, tell me, cuz I don't know either.

Jake Malicious 06/14/07 8:00 pm

Q: What's harder than nailing a dead baby to a wall? A: My dick while I'm doing it!

Jake Malicious 09/06/07 3:33 pm

Am I the only one who comments on old articles?

-----Original Message-----

From: Cil*** @ ***.com

Sent: Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Subject: BABY TSHIRTS

I received and email with these shirts on babies...I think they are totally disqusting and offensive. You are right on with the name of your company!!! How ridiculous to put a shirt with saying like that on a sweet innocent baby..

Editor's Note: I'll respond to this in a moment, but I'd like to clear the air about something first. People occasionally email us and ask why I don't make fun of grammatical mistakes more often. There is a simple explanation. It's just too easy to pick on grammatical errors. On top of that, it also doesn't warrant much mockery. I do point them out from time to time, but how often can you point out a misspelled word before you're beating a dead horse to a bloody pulp?

bush So someone's finger slips and hits s instead of w. Who fucking cares? Mocking someone's ignorant mindset is not only funnier than pointing out mistakes in grammar, it is also more meaningful. Picking apart this person's grammar is like observing the Bush presidency and mocking him for saying "nucular." It's cheap, easy and, most important, not funny.

Having said that, did you notice that this person spelled 'and' instead of 'an' and spelled disgusting with a q? What a jackass! That's much more pathetic than someone wasting their life away complaining about what shirts other people choose to put on their babies. What's the matter, buddy? Can't tell the difference between a g and a q? Haven't you ever heard of spell check or a backspace key? LOSER! For simply typing in the incorrect letter you should rot in Hell for all eternity and be nose-raped by a baboon while Satan pisses acid in your eyes.

And thus concludes my lesson about typos.

Comments (26) - View Comments - Add A Comment

Douchebarf 02/07/07 5:56 pm

Babies can't read

Kavinorum 02/07/07 10:39 pm

Hmm, I think that is more of a fan mail, though it may not have been purposefully.

Tank Girl 02/08/07 7:09 am

Babies are sweet and innocent, huh? What about that baby that raped that woman in California? Wasn't so sweet and innocent then, was it? Of course I am high right now and probably just imagined it.

hangingrat 02/08/07 9:42 am

Babies are assholes anyway. Fuck 'em.

bored horny 02/08/07 9:55 am

rape nucular ridiculous blah blah blah . . . . .

so, if anyone would send me naked pictures of themself and/or sister, it would be greatly appreciated. IM: ritaliagrozac

Elskan 02/08/07 9:59 am

How is a baby's innocence some sort of argument against the products? I don't get it.

It's an infant's complete lack of motor skills that leaves them open for not only "dress-up" but ridicule, humiliation, puppetry, physical attacks and, of course, rape. All without a chance of defense for themselves. This is not only amusing as all get-out, but pretty much the natural order of things. If infants were not meant for such treatment, why would nature leave them so completely susceptible to it?

Should an infant somehow survive such activities, you can be well assured their long-suffering survival is guaranteed. They will have been tempered well in the flames of abuse, and capable of enduring nearly any difficulty they may face in the rest of the world. All of this was made possible because that child's parent had the foresight, the sense of responsibility and the _compassion_... to dress them up in amusing t-shirts (as well as ridicule, humiliate, puppet, physically attack and rape them).

And yet the complainer here doesn't care for this? Finds the simplest act of compassion towards infants distasteful? Seems to me as though someone doesn't care about giving babies the opportunities needed for them to learn valuable survival skills. For shame, for shame.

hundekiefer 02/08/07 10:23 am

I don't like to see kids wearing clothes ANYWAY - the fabric itself is what offends me. What the fuck do I care if there's some words on it, or some stick figures "riding the mechanical bull"?

chromevapors 02/08/07 3:21 pm

Aren't the parents the one dressing the kids in these shirts and not the helpless kids themselves?? Have a sense of humor they're FUCKIN HILARIOUS

Kzuki 02/08/07 3:23 pm

If the baby really gave two shits, he/she wouldn't spend so much time sitting in a diaper full of it!

Voodoo_Matt 02/09/07 3:41 am

Have a damn sense of humour!!!! I mean, nobody's forcing you to buy the freakin' shirt so why complain on something which doesn't affect you at all? It makes no sense. Babies don't know what you put on them and if you do put something like that on them, it's your fault, not the company who makes the shirt. Deal with it!

jacky 02/09/07 6:11 am

Why would anyone want to dress up a baby is beyond me. I mean, with all this "taking off clothes" shit, it gets way more difficult to assrape them while waiting for a bus that's just around the corner.

MitchZ 02/09/07 8:10 am

With babies, every hole is a deep throat! =D

rachel 02/09/07 8:24 am

the baby shirts are the funniest, how can you not find humour in the "are you my daddy" t shirt? I personally believe that anyone that goes on Maury for DNA tests should be forced to have their children in those t shirts while on the show! The sarcastic tone of the "who would buy such a horrible shirt for their fucking baby" t is priceless. Furthermore the "sweet innocent baby" comment is useless, for some of those babies will grow up and the most important thing they will ever do is ride the pole, so it's best if we get them used to comical t shirts and sarcasm at a young age! If a t-shirt on this website offends you, you are not getting the point and/or the humour behind the creative GENIUS that is T-Shirt Hell. I say rock on creative genius and when are we gonna get a shirt about Anna Nicole Smith?

~crazy peanut~ 02/09/07 10:30 am

I like cookies.

LimpyMcFatso 02/09/07 1:22 pm

What I find most hilarious about this person's complaint is the insinuation that T-Shirt Hell is forcing their shirts onto babies. I'm hungry.

Private Jake 02/09/07 8:15 pm

I hate ytpo's also!!! Lazy Basturds...I'm buying my nephew a couple of shirts from this site and find absolutely nothing offensive about any of them...But my sister will!

Jenika 02/10/07 9:51 am

Like the babys gunna really remember what it wore when it was 6 months old. Grow up, and let the people who live on 4 or 5 hours of sleep a night have some humor in their lives.

MacBeth Beaverhausen 02/10/07 10:52 am

Why are people so fucking stupid? =(

Robney 02/11/07 11:16 pm

Finally a site where we can all express our hatred, a fuckin secret society. I hate all of you and i hope your mothers jerk you off with fresh AIDS blood and you die a slow death.

Zbad1 02/12/07 2:20 pm

You know, I have been a customer of this company since before they went all noble and got rid of a lot of the "more offensive" shirts... lucky for me, I bought them...now they are collectors items... HA! Anyway.. if people are so offended they do have the option of NOT COMING TO THE FUCKING WEBSITE! Morons... go bang Jerry Falwell or tackle fuck Tammy Faye.. its offensive and funny shirts that will win this war for us.. (oh, and heavy artillery)

Wickedlyamoral 02/12/07 3:07 pm

ever think to just not read it? Moron.

Ratzinger 02/12/07 7:10 pm

fuck god

dedbabyfukker 02/14/07 7:32 am

The author of this e-mail misses the point of the baby hell shirts. They're even funnier when worn by fully grown adults. My personal favorites are "I Can Kick Your Baby's Ass" and "I Shit My Pants and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt!" I also have "Hung Like a 5-Year Old," but the truth isn't funny...it's just sad.

Matt 02/14/07 10:34 am

who cares, its not like the babies can read

Lemon Of Doom 02/14/07 7:07 pm

Ahh, I love listening to the rants of stupid people. I mean, I deal with stupid people everyday who are offended by the word "Mexican" and "damn." How the fuck does one get offended by "Damn?" Anyways, I don't find grammar to be as big of an issue as stupidity itself. I, Myself, make grammar errors all the time. I'm not necessarily stupid. I have a shirt that says: "One by one, the penguins steal my sanity." And every single time I wear it, there is always one person that asks me, "What does 'sanity' mean?" Fuck. I think some of those people are the ones who have a problem with these "offensive" shirts.

Brandon Brown 02/19/07 12:02 pm

omgz noes wayz

-----Original Message-----

From: Nabeel G.

Sent: Monday, January 22, 2007

hiya mate

I would truly appreciate it, if you could remove some of your offencive logos on this site. I my self happening to be a practicing Christian, and i have come upon your site and feel ashamed to see people like your self. if you co-operate i will contact the arch Bishop of Canterbury and inform him to hold a religous meeting regarding the issues concerning this.

sonofadog you son of a dog

Editor's Note: Son of a dog? Are you the bad guy in a movie from 1932 about Sinbad the Sailor? At least you didn't call me a sniveling cur. That I would not stand for sir. Anyway, I respect your right to happening to be a practicing Christian, I just wish you wouldn't happening to be a practicing dumbfuck in the process.

Regardless, I'd like to comply with your request to remove some of our offensive shirts, but I need you to be a little more specific. Shirts about rape and racism are the standard tees that initiate complaints, but you might be offended by something else. I assume you would be more offended by shirts about religion, retards, and religious retards, but I can't be sure until you send me a list of shirts you find offensive.

So just do that and I'll be sure and remove them immediately. Lord knows I don't want to incur the wrath of the Archbishop of Canterbury. I've been on thin ice with that guy ever since I tied him down and paid a family of gypsies to anally rape him with a bunch of rusty railroad spikes.

Comments (60) - View Comments - Add A Comment

A-money 02/07/07 9:21 pm

dogs dont wear t-shirts

big314mp 02/07/07 10:02 pm

WTF?! "f you co-operate i will contact the arch Bishop of Canterbury." Damn christians sending mexed missages again.

Kavinorum 02/07/07 10:16 pm

Uh, do these people even look at the name of the site? Its TshirtHELL!!! As in the place where SATAN lives. Of course it will have shirts offensive to Christians, they are in HELL. This is not TshirtHEAVEN where the fruity feel good shirts are.

Rebecca 02/07/07 10:37 pm

Religous Retards..... HA HA HA HA

Fyrewolf Seahawk 02/08/07 1:53 am

Isn't it nice to know that people care about your soul...*insert sarcasim here*

PaLfReY 02/08/07 3:56 am

what dose a raping with rusty railroad spikes by a family of gypsies go for these days? i know a few more people who could use one

Dodgy 02/08/07 5:16 am

Where the fuck do these people come from?

Dark-Side 02/08/07 5:23 am

I'm a student at the university of Kent and I've got a shit load of T-Shirt Hell shirts. My favourite one is my Mary was only a Virgin one. when it gets warmer (its bloody snowing at the moment) i will proudly take pictures of myself in this shirt outside of the Cathedral!

up2nuthingud 02/08/07 7:20 am

UH OH, you did it now! The arch Bishop of Canterbury is a bad dude. Rumor has it he made the last t-shirt company say 100 hail marys. Who friggin cares about the arch Bishop?

superworm 02/08/07 7:45 am

it's people like you, hate-mail sender, who ruin Christianity for the rest of us. shut up, grow a pair, and leave us the fuck alone.

Evil Elvis 02/08/07 8:48 am

Bet you didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition. Watch out for the comfy chair!

Zipper 02/08/07 9:58 am

erm...I think they may have been joking, guys, a pissed Xtian would hardly start "Hiya Mate" !!

Me 02/08/07 11:11 am

rock on buddy. gotta tell ya im a christian too, but i think christian and anal whore are two very different things! haha. keep it up. shove that cross up thier ass!

dracklema 02/08/07 11:17 am

umm yeah raised catholic here and i can tell u now that as just a regular person u cant contact the arch bishop and if u send him a letter he will most likely toss it our and not care. also if u dont like the shirts then leave the site simple as a click on the x in the top right.

None of your damned business 02/08/07 12:31 pm

Maybe he wouldn't feel so ashamed if he'd stop coming upon the site. That makes a mess of your computer and it makes Jesus cry!

lyricalDEVIL 02/08/07 2:19 pm

Hey guys, Archbishop Rowan Williams here. I happened upon this site while doing my daily google search for "Satan, hell, and ape feces." I just wanted to say that I love your shirts, and I have taken it upon myself to personally make sure this 'Christian' burns in Hell for eternity.

lebowski 02/08/07 3:18 pm

As a practising christian i also am deeply offended by the hate you have for us, i could barely finish bum holing the altar boy your comments bothered me so much

Derek 02/08/07 4:49 pm

fuck you why bring religeon into this its just somefunny t-shirts you dumb ass christian hail satan

Zeke 02/08/07 6:59 pm

The Archbishop of who? What's he going to do -- tsk-tsk us to death?

Max 02/08/07 7:11 pm

Ideally, all of the people who hate tshirt hell would shut the fuck up and leave them alone. If you d on't like the site, TOO FUCKING BAD. NOBODY IS MAKING YOU BE HERE (Unless you've met the editor and are tied down while being railroad-spike raped by gypsies while infront of the site).

dawgie 02/08/07 8:05 pm

the christians killed more jews than hitler

ItamiOzanare 02/08/07 8:55 pm

Mixed signals much? I mean he makes a somewhat polite (if fairly stupid and unreasonable) request and then ends it with an out of place, nonsensical insult.

easy el 02/09/07 12:27 am

hey, god! i was one of those gypsies and now that son of a bitch wont stop calling me...

Paul 02/09/07 12:44 am

How long have you been "practicing" at being a christian? maybe yo should concentrate on that more so you can be an actual christian instead of just practicing at being one!

EH Hole 02/09/07 1:07 am

The only good christian is a dead christian..........think about it

deadclownsundae 02/09/07 2:02 am

If someone is so deovted to their religion why the hell are they at a Tshirt site that is ment to offend. I want to rape this guy with the baby jesus butt plug or maybe the jackhammer jesus from that devine-interventions website. That will make him rediscover god again.

J. Doom 02/09/07 5:14 am

"I my self happening to be a practicing Christian" -- my condolences, for your afflictions, both the neurological disorder that causes you to type like a quadriplegic & the other neurological disorder known as "Christianity". get well soon... or don't... one less bible-waving mental patient in the world is no skin off my balls.

jacky 02/09/07 5:27 am

Hold on, Nabeel. How would you feel if you were cussed with such an outdated invective? Probably just terrible. Now that "happening" to be not very "practicing Christian" of you to say such things to another person. Would the arch Bishop of Canterbury be so pleased? No, he wouldn't.

Blunt_weepun 02/09/07 6:45 am

man, these email are fake aren't em? they push too far on the way of dumbfuckness

wormwood 02/09/07 7:48 am

gypsies, anal rape, rusty railroad spikes...That sounds like a damn good time to a catholic. Now, would it be a simple insertion or would the gyps use a big hammer to ass pound the bishop with the rusty spike, you know, like a dirty chink railworker?

kitty 02/09/07 9:49 am

I asked the Archbishop if he minded about the Christian shirts on here when I was flogging his cock with barbed wire last week. He said they're fine, but there's some pain in the fucking ass called nabeel (sounds muslim to me) who keeps bitching about 'em, and its kinda pissin him off....

monkeylooker 02/09/07 9:59 am

i am a catholic person and i feel that this ass wipe is offending us i mean who don't like ass rape the archbishop taught me how to do it right the nerve of some people (priest have the best candy)

booty 02/09/07 11:31 am

Religion is the number one thing that has stopped the technological advancement of man. When people yell at me for being atheist, and ask me what I believe the after life is like, I tell them it is probably allot like before birth. Not only do I get some really funny looks (which is a small religious mind now planted with the seed of doubt,) but sometimes I even get a quick remark, similar to ‘you son of a dog.’ Honestly, if you think that some higher being will be pissed off because some website is selling humored shits, then this higher being is a fag. He has much larger problems than tshirthell.com.

LimpyMcFatso 02/09/07 1:26 pm

Maybe he meant to say he's a "happenin'" Christian. you know, like in slang? lol. No seriously he should be killed. And I think Christians are retarded, frankly. Everyone knows God's unitarian.

steveo 02/09/07 2:04 pm

I happen to know the Archbishop of Canterbury and he says he's never heard of you ass-face

DP 02/09/07 2:56 pm

you should have more shirts about killling christians or raping them they persoally make me laugh. throw in the word retard and something about hitler too. classic gold. n fix these veri. codes they hardly work.

foofoolamarr 02/09/07 3:16 pm

The "arch Bishop" of Canterbury? Do I detect three curled ostrich feathers and a drag queen? I think I do.

Ms. Mischief 02/09/07 4:01 pm

I really wish these fucking people ( and I use that word very loosely) would stop sending these fucking hate emails to you. I do think that it's rather fucking hilarious when you dog them the way that you do. All they have to do is block the damn site from their computer, or never type it in again. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!

Tim 02/09/07 5:59 pm

When someone tells me that they're a practicing christian, I tell them to keep practicing until they get it right, and get out of my face.

Fishbelly the Magnificent 02/09/07 7:48 pm

They say that practice makes perfect, but if you practice someothing in the completely wrong manner than you don't improve at all, you just get really good at being really bad at something. Somehow I think that's what most "practicing christians" are doing these days. Also, if I remember correctly, somewhere in the bible it says something along the lines of "do onto others as one would have done onto themselves". Now this being stated I think it is our right, no, responsibility as tshirt hell whores to go out and find christian websites and send them hate mail. You know because obviously that's what they want us to do! So whose with me. Also if you join my club, Hate Mail for Christians Who Send Hate Mail, I'll throw in a family of gypsies. Rail road spikes not included. And they may be dead on arrival due a shortage of funds for propper shipping.

The Archbishop of Canterbury 02/10/07 12:50 am

She contacted me, now you're gonna get it!! MUWAHAHAHAHA.

Big John 02/10/07 4:04 am

Y'all should make a shirt about religious retards. that would be funny.

Una 02/10/07 6:35 pm

AHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA aaaaaa.....

DAN 02/10/07 10:50 pm

Son of a dog?Nice.Personaly,I`m a little more afraid of christians than T-shirts,but thats just me.

Jwolf 02/10/07 10:57 pm

Every time some dumbfuck christian says something retarded, the Archbishop of Canterbury rapes a little boy. Keep it up assholes, he's loving it. T-shirt Hell you kick ass, keep pissing people off, they deserve it.

aaron 02/10/07 11:22 pm

@Tim
Even if they do "get it right", they will still be Christian dumbfucks...

jay 02/10/07 11:26 pm

I like where you went with this letter, very good pointing out that even though Bush is an idiot, it's to easy to bash him, and then you moved on...Bush bashing is no longer fun, and only the week minded still go after him...

bethany 02/11/07 12:54 pm

well, can god and jesus be removed off the internet all together, because i'm just sick of seeing that shit...

Commie 02/11/07 8:23 pm

You killed me with the rusty anal spikes. They must have replaced the Archbishop with a copy like they did for Castro :P

Zbad1 02/12/07 2:24 pm

Ok.... practicing Christian??? Are you somehow lacking in the skills and need to work on your Holy Curveball.. practicing for the big game??? What are you practicing.. i'm gonna have to stand by my previous comment...Don't come on the site if it offends you... seems as though some people are just poking around online looking for something to bitch about.. I think I'm going to go to a LDS or Scientology website and complain about their content... How'd you like that?

who cares 02/12/07 2:57 pm

why do you people even right in with these stupid ass coments??? I think every person that writes in with there dump ass "I'm a _____ and I think ____. WHO THE FUCK ASKED THEM? THANKS TO ALL YOU DUMB FUCKERS AND KEEP SENDING IN YOU STUPID BULL SHIT COMMENTS SO I CAN READ "THE THING" EVERY MONTH AND LAUGH AT YOU!!!!!!!!!

Huni 02/13/07 11:00 am

of course you dont want to incur the wrath of the Archbishop of Canterbury.. he's your biggest customer....

Matt 02/14/07 10:30 am

yea, well if you are such a good christian then why dont you set parental controls for yourself. and another thing what is more offensive the archbishop raping little boys or some harmless t-shirts........ yea thats what i thought.

Matt 02/14/07 10:38 am

they will remove the shirts when you remove yourself from the world

Malis 02/19/07 10:44 am

Personally, I find it fucking sad that there seem to be a whole shitload of people in this country with nothing better to do that sit in a darkened room by themselves with the tv and computer on, waiting to be ofended by something.

Brandon Brown 02/19/07 12:08 pm

Oh yeah. I know the Arch Bishop or Cadbury Cream Eggs. He is going to hold 2 meetings about how their cream is actually made from ground organs of various religious leaders around the globe. Did I mention that bunnies don't lay eggs?

Caitie 03/07/07 4:00 pm

GUESS WHAT!!! I am a practicing christian too! AND if you dont like the shirts on the site, then DONT VISIT IT. It is an optional thing to visit this site. I cant say I like all of the shirts, but I CHOSE to visit here, so it is my fault I am reading them. Offensive or not. If you dont like the shirts, stop comming here ASS HOLE! <3, Caitie

Jake Malicious 06/14/07 8:18 pm

How many times must I see a "If you don't like the t-shirts, don't come to this site" rant on these comments before I have to kill myself?

Jake Malicious 06/14/07 8:19 pm

How many times must I see a "If you don't like the t-shirts, don't come to this site" rant on these comments before I have to kill myself?

Jake Malicious 06/14/07 8:20 pm

Double-posted for emphasis.

-----Original Message-----

From: KEVIN H.

jeeeesus Sent: Thursday, February 1, 2007

I thought I should tell u the disgrace you put on the reputation of the american people. "if jesus comes back we'll kill him again" in a childs size??? that's wrong and your feeding into communties as laughter and jokes. this company is embarassing and wrong. just let up a little

Editor's Note: I'm sorry that we're feeding laughter and jokes into communities. I considered feeding dumb and bitch into communities, but...well, you know.

And, just so you know, the fact that I'm a disgrace to the reputation of the American people is a point of pride with me. We are widely perceived as obese, greedy, over-indulgent warmongers, so to disgrace that reputation makes me feel all warm and moist inside.

And you should be thankful that children wear our shirts. If they didn't get the shirt they'd just go out and get a tattoo that says the same thing. And concerning this specific shirt, I was going to kill Jesus the second he arrived from Heaven, but thanks to your email, I'm going to wait until he kills your kids before I do it.

Comments (33) - View Comments - Add A Comment

Kavinorum 02/07/07 10:21 pm

That message needs a correction. Everywhere it says something is "wrong" it shoud say "is what KEVIN H. thinks is wrong since he has his own morals" If my morals say to kill jesus then that is what I will do. See my morals are just as fucked up as Kevin's morals or anyone else for that matter.

Weapon 02/07/07 11:18 pm

It really blows my mind when someone uses a shortcut for one word "u" and then not 2 fucking words later will spell it out properly. Also, your and you're ... holy shit, what kind of public schooling system do you have down south? For every buck toothed, slack jawed, y'all saying motherfucker that says your fat, stupid and smell like dick cheese on a hot July day, instead of, you are, or you're fat, stupid and smell like dick cheese on a hot July day, I will tazer a baby.

Boultby 02/08/07 9:24 am

What the fuck is wrong with these people? I own this shirt and didn't even know it came in a child's size, so what are they doing looking all over the site, just so they can complain about it. One or 2 of the shirts on this site haven't been to my taste, but i know there's nothing i can do to change it, and don't look at them, some people come onto the site just to see what new shirts they can complain about. Just fuck off to someone who cares, ain't nobody listening here. Shitbag

Dave GLenn 02/08/07 9:38 am

There should be a disclaimer on your site as follows:WARNING- DO NOT ENTER THIS SITE- unless you possess an open mind and a sense of humor!

doylie 02/08/07 12:06 pm

oh shit! i thought the childrens sizes were so that the fucking midgets could buy them and offend christians as well! my bad.

JESUS 02/08/07 3:42 pm

I am Jesus. When the Jews killed me 2007 years ago, I enjoyed it. And that is how I invented sado-masochism

Jake5253 02/08/07 4:04 pm

Yes, it's such a terrible thing to be feeding laughter and jokes into the communities of today where nothing fun is acceptable. No, we must feed everyone fake news, false data and instil them with the fear of death and/or attack. No fun for you! I like how most Christians think the world does (or should) revolve around them and any ideas that differ from theirs are "wrong." I respect the idea of people grouping together for religion and loving each other in such a manner, but when they think they can have a limiting affect on my life, that's going way too far.

Zeke 02/08/07 6:57 pm

How about if we just rough Jesus up this time instead of going for all-out murder? Hell, let's just half-ass everything we do. You'd like that, wouldn't you, you lazy bastard?

Max 02/08/07 7:13 pm

Is there something in the bible says "My fellow retards: Go look at T-shirt sites and complain to them. It is my word"?

Fishbelly The Magnificent 02/08/07 11:23 pm

Now if and when Jesus comes back, he's not going to be taken seriously. He's going to wander from town to town getting kicked out of each as he runs around muttering in a dead language that nobody understands until he's picked up for loitering, vagrancy, public urination and possibly even rape (after 2000 some years you get a little horny, assuming of course that you most definitly don't get to fuck in heaven, especially not if you're unwed) So now he's in county, crazy as shit house rat and doesn't have any ID. After a couple of months of solitude he'd be given to the INS and beaten within and inch or two of his life. You know, to get him to quit muttering and speak in some non-archaic language. So once they realize that it's not going to stop anytime soon, they give him to the local nut house, drug him up and let him mutter a little quieter and a little less often. That's what's going to happen when Jesus comes back.

The Waco Kid 02/08/07 11:25 pm

Thing is, didn't Jesus already come back? He went by the name David Koresh, told people about how he was the son of God and this time around when we took him out it was even more of a spectacle.

deadclownsundae 02/09/07 2:06 am

Here I thought the American people were disgracing themselves with shows like you take my whore of a wife for a couple weeks and I'll take yours, or here is the nanny that will beat your child to submission so they will listen to you again. Lets not forget the show that insults people because they can't sing for shit. Or the humiliate a random celebrity hour with Anna Nicole getting raped in her coffin while eating trimspa pills out of her twat (too soon?)

reaper 02/09/07 5:01 am

not soon enough! fuck! why can't all these religious fucks go pick on the arabs instead? at least they give a flying fuck!

jacky 02/09/07 6:13 am

I just don't get how one can get annoyed by a t-shirt that says that when a hippie that lived two millenia ago, spoke shit and sparked off a religion that killed literally millions of people and made millions more useless, brainless and humorless comes back, someone will kill him. I certainly will. Time and time again.

MitchZ 02/09/07 8:13 am

KevinH, You're the load your mother should have swallowed. If retard was a liquid, you'd have drowned already.

Anal Leakage 02/09/07 9:08 am

I am jesus, and I approve this shirt.

MONKEYLOOKER 02/09/07 10:05 am

Sorry but Jesus just killed another retart
now i have to clean up

sarah six 02/09/07 10:44 am

she should be glad SOMEONE is teaching "our" children this shit. not like the schools are doing the little bastards justice nowadays.

LimpyMcFatso 02/09/07 1:31 pm

LOL i love how she's so forceful and strong in her beliefs and then she ends it with "just let up a little". And the tattoo defense is true, you know if T-Shirt Hell didn't have certain shirts, right now i'd be covered in ink that said "I'm not Fat, I'm just pregnant with ice-cream's baby." But you can't strangle someone to death with a tattoo.

davidp 02/09/07 2:48 pm

well i think the shirts true in that we will kill him if he comes back. probably not me, but someone will. I don't get their e-mail tho or the reason for it other then to get recognized for being an idiot. anyone who says anything negative about the site just gets their e-mail posted and gets a humorous word beat-down. you'd think they'd learn but apparently not. oh and people who choose to simplify online words such a u and your i'm all for. i do it myself. doesn't mean i'm retarded or a moron i just choose to type that way instead of trying to be a dick about every little letter in every word. does it make you feel special to know you can type corrctly? bcuz if it does your just an insecure jackass trying to pick out others faults to cover your own. grow up. and saraha six i don't appreciate you calling me a little bastard just bcuz the school stsyem sucks. i suggest you kill yourself and your offspring for saying something like that. thanks for the new comment bar t-shirthell guys. i like it :)

John 02/09/07 5:39 pm

I agree. The hundreds of Iraqis that die every day because we blew up their government and took their running water and electricity, that doesn't shame America. What some bitch puts on a t-shirt online does.

Kendra 02/09/07 11:23 pm

"I thought I should tell u the disgrace you put on the reputation of the american people" ....personally people like that put disgrace on the reputation of American people...too many lame ass bible thumpers with their fingers too far up their assholes. They take everything WAY too seriously! Why would they be at this site if they found this kind of shit offensive?

Big John 02/10/07 4:07 am

I have a cat named Jesus I smoke with. I got Jesus high in the Middle East! That's my claim to fame. Jesus saves.... roaches

Dog's Bollocks 02/10/07 8:27 am

This mail just goes to prove what I have always said about "the reputation of the american people". You're decended for the nutjobs, murderers, racists, rapists, theives, bastards and religious rejects of pretty much all the filthy little European countries under the sun. Fortunatley the nutjobs and rapists make fucking incredible t-shirts and everyone else is going to get deep throated with a bloody crucifix when Jesus finally arrives and makes America his sadistic pleasure dome. What kind of person isn't going to try and tell their child to kill jesus? They need to be warned of how they're going to be fucked bloody, and that's why I personally rape my children every day.

Una 02/10/07 6:42 pm

I like this one, it's ok as long you don't put it in childs size! Fucking idiot! Children want to wear cool stuff too, and he wants it all for himself lol.
And ofcourse Jesus will be killed as soon as he comes back - do you know how many jews there are in the world?!

sarah 02/11/07 6:54 pm

Lets be honest here, if a man with a beard came back spouting love, equality, kindess, and said he was the son of god what would america do? Most likely kill him, or at least stick him in a crazy house and throw away the key. Let's all just be a little more realistic and stop fooling ourselves. Jesus didn't stand a chance then.. he wouldn't now.

jamie 02/12/07 2:11 pm

a disgrace? we can only hope to one day be as badass and sarcastic as the bitch who writes the newsletter. for the people who dont like the site or the shirts...ignore it. or dont, its more amusement for me.

Kay 02/13/07 7:16 pm

This is why i'm glad i'm canadian :D (slightly better). ppl think we're nice, which makes it easier to fuck someone over...

Love the comments; deadclownsundae, anna nicole has always been fair game... being dead doesn't excuse her from an anal rape.

Matt 02/14/07 10:35 am

they will let up a little when you "put out a little", now shut up u bible banger

Ninny 02/18/07 1:05 am

Does this mean I'm a disgrace to America since I wear this stuff?

Oh well.

What the fuck has America ever done for me?

Not very much. So who cares?

Brandon Brown 02/19/07 12:10 pm

I believe that pressuring children into believing a religion at a young age is wrong.

Oh noes, my comment code thingy is WSGOD

harry scrotum 02/24/07 6:13 pm

i heart you editor person :) let me know when ur gonna kill jesus cuz i wanna help

Karl 03/12/07 7:38 am

You are not a disgrace to the american people or whatever. I'm from Europe (Norway) and i love your shirts, it's just freedom of speech. And I'm a christian too, but i got no problem with the Jesus jokes, I see the humor in it..and laugh..hehe. =)

-----Original Message-----

From: Kristy K.

Sent: Friday, February 2, 2007

To whom it may concern,

I'm all for freedom of speech and screw whoever I offend, but is the tshirt "I swear I didn't know she was 3" and other pedolphilic phrases really necessary? Do people really buy those? Wait, I'm sure they do. I just think it is gross. I normally think your stuff is funny, but those just hit me the wrong way.

Kristy

Editor's Note: You goddamn cunt. If I ever see you in public I'm going to run barbed wire between your legs like it's a towel until your genital region is nothing more than a bloody mash of lady-parts.

I'm sorry. I said that to my mom last night and I thought it seemed appropriate to say it here. Regarding your questions, the answer is yes on both counts. These shirts are necessary and people do really buy them.

santa People seem to think that our shirts create pedophiles and rapists. These people already exist. We just give them something funny to wear. It is law enforcement's job to arrest criminals. It's our job to let them, and the rest of us, laugh at their atrocities until that fateful day when they are arrested.

And aside from lightening up an otherwise tense situation, these shirts also reward the craftier and more effective sex criminals. If you sodomize one toddler or rape one woman and get thrown in jail, fuck you. You don't deserve our shirts. But if someone can molest child after child and violate woman after woman, don't they deserve some kind reward? I think so. And so does a fella by the name of Uncle Sam. God bless America.

Comments (51) - View Comments - Add A Comment

Jason L. 02/07/07 5:56 pm

I like pedophilic jokes they keep me young.

Jamie 02/07/07 8:52 pm

I was all about your shirts. I love comming to this site and seeing the new shit you've come up with, until I read this statement.. "But if someone can molest child after child and violate woman after woman, don't they deserve some kind reward?"

Jason 02/07/07 9:03 pm

hahaha, awesome!

Tony 02/07/07 10:07 pm

"We just give them something funny to wear" is the sweetest line ever! I laughed out loud. Keep up the good work!

Georgia 02/07/07 10:27 pm

Looks like Jamie up there has fallen among the most annoying of all of tshirthell's hate mail correspondents, besmirching the new comment feature no less! Look, if you like the shirts, except for the one thing that just "crosses the line," stop visiting the site. They're not hurting for it. Do us all a favor and shut yer trap.

Kavinorum 02/07/07 10:34 pm

Fuck Kristy and fuck Jamie. Both of you are so fucking hypocritical. Of course everything is funny, from school shootings and terrorisms to queer beatings and jesus killings, but mention one rape and all of a sudden its all fucked up and gross. I hate you fucks. What do you think that just because you think everything else is funny that we will agree with you about rape? No, you cant have it both ways! Oh, you were raped as a child? WHO CARES! ITS JUST A FUCKING COCK! ITS THE SAME THING AS WHEN YOU TAKE IT IN THE ASS FROM YOUR BOYFRIEND/HUSBAND! Its all in your fucking head about whether you wanted it there or not and you need to get over it.

Halo 02/08/07 12:32 am

Man,and I really do hope you are a man(cause I am female but hate chicks) All I can say is stand up and scream it loud. If something is funny it is just funny and if some people can't get over it well then they should just avoid your site...and everything else in the world that makes them think..or laugh....or deal with the fact that the world isn't a pretty fucking ball where everything is as wonderfull as they would like to believe it is.

Chainsaw 02/08/07 1:00 am

I love it when people get their feelings hurt because of something a shirt says. It makes life worth living when that same person gets their ignorant one sided oppinion crammed back down their throat. I want to make a holiday called "cross the line day" where all you do all day is do things that are messed up and piss people off.

Erik 02/08/07 5:55 am

Great! Any jokes about pedophiles and rapists are really sweet and makes my tummy go all tingly. I hope more people start respecting child molesters for who they really are and stop judging them just because they happen to rape kids. It's just stupid... Keep 'em comin'!

Stacy 02/08/07 7:32 am

I am PROOF people buy the pedo shirts! I had your newest one, My inner pedophile fucked your inner child on my wish list. One of my best friends got it for me for my birthday. I just got it yesterday and plan on wearing it out with my husband this Friday on our weekly date night. He of course will be wearing his I enjoy a good spanking shirt.

Benji 02/08/07 8:16 am

These people who want the world run purely to what they themselves see as right and wrong get on my fucking tits. There is so much shit in this world how the fuck can they be offended by a t-shirt? And don't even get me started on the ones who say "this just crossed my line"...

Benji 02/08/07 8:18 am

Anyone want a beer?

Anne 02/08/07 8:34 am

I agree Jason, they keep alive my inner child... I mean, the child in me... I mean the child I'm in.

Elskan 02/08/07 10:17 am

I have to give it to Kristy on one point: she didn't tell you to remove the shirt(s), or threaten the loss of patronage, or any of the usual shite. She just stated her opinion, asked a couple things that were bugging her, and wrapped it up. Not so bad for hate mail.

But Kristy, look at it this way: there's no reason to give a shit what gets printed on a t-shirt and what doesn't. If you enjoy some shirts, excellent: go buy some. If you find some offensive or disturbing--and here's the key part--DON'T BUY THEM.

That does two things. 1- Stops at least one unit from being purchased (which is justification for selling it), and 2- Stops you from having to support the sentiment by wearing it (the sole intention of the product's design). Probably one of the most significant ways to show your distaste with a product is to not use or even buy it. Beyond that, you're posturing and wasting time.

Jackie 02/08/07 11:35 am

Isn't it a good thing to label our pedophiles? I find it helpful.

zach 02/08/07 11:37 am

haha, that shirt is the first t-shirt hell shirt I have ever owned. Oh it brings joy to my heart reading this, as did the tons of other people coming up to me and bitching about the shirt (that and the "I eat more pussy than cervical cancer" shirt)

Daniel 02/08/07 12:25 pm

There is only one taboo subject that is so taboo that no one is allowed to even talk about them without fearing for their lives. Yes, pedophilia. I commend TShirtHell for having the guts to not only talk about, but to poke fun at, the subject. Everyone else needs to open up and really discuss the subject, they might find that (a) there really are millions of closet pedophiles and (b) that there really are millions of children who would like to be having relations with these pedophiles. Let them get together if they choose and you will eliminate child rape. At the same time, and for the same reason, legalize prostitution idiots! Some guys just CAN'T get women without paying for them. Wouldn't you rather they pay for pleasure rather than rape and murder to satisfy themselves?

Jawsh 02/08/07 12:31 pm

yeah.. it would be nice if every pedophile wore this shirt.. it would help kids know who to look out for.. or to seek after, if they're into that kinda thing.

lyricalDEVIL 02/08/07 2:37 pm

The problem, wait, make that PROBLEMS, with people today are that they've started to think that their opinion not only MATTERS, but is better than anyone else's. Also, they don't realize that anything meant to be funny, IS funny. If it's meant as a joke, don't take it seriously, because that's what makes it a JOKE! Jesus, lighten up America.

Ian 02/08/07 4:42 pm

In response to Jamie, i'm just happy i've finally recieved some just desserts for all those cold lonely nights waiting down alleyways

Donovan Chaffin 02/08/07 5:11 pm

Don't you just love how our world works? It's perfectly fucking okay to make fun of the niggers and spics and wops and the president and retards, but make ONE shirt that has pedophile on it and some jackass will be ready to shoot someone. Talk about double standards. I have never seen a shirt yet that offended me on this site. But that's because I know that if some shit offends me to just go "Oh." and keep browsing, not go off on it like a midget at a peepshow.

Donovan Chaffin 02/08/07 5:13 pm

By the way, when can we start celebrating "Cross the line" day. That'd kick ass.

Zeke 02/08/07 6:55 pm

Y'know, if some pedophile's going to molest my kids, I want to be damn sure he's a pedophile of discriminating taste. Take away these shirts and what proof will I have of whether or not I'm dealing with a debonair pedophile?

AFitch 02/08/07 11:18 pm

Lets get this cross the line day rolling. I will book the day off work. Better yet, I will wear tshirt hell shirts to work and tell off anyone that gets offended (I work at Abercrombie so I dont get in trouble for telling people off)

Cy 02/09/07 1:22 am

Hehe, I wore that Shirt to a meeting to see if I wanted to attend a high school and the guidance counsler said it was "borderline inappropriate"{. LOL

jacky 02/09/07 6:07 am

I may sound Lolita-style, but I totally support pedophilia. I mean, what's wrong with both an infant and an adult person getting some action, as long as they both want it? Or at least, as long as neither/none of them objects thoroughly. The age of consent thing is ridiculous. Just because I fucked over a dozen of kindergarten-aged doesn't mean I have to get 2 to 12! They fucking liked it! I made sure of it when I used half a pack of valium on them.

cif 02/09/07 6:51 am

I just love dumbasses that say "I just loved your shirts until I saw the one that pissed me off..."... here's a little story about hypocrisy and being a whiny little bitch: Some cunt was browsing a certain site, i won't tell which, with some friends. They were laughing at other people's misfortunes, stories and pictures of which were represented at said site. Then she comes upon one that struck home, as she had had a misfortune cast upon herself that year, that involved her baby (and death). Then she proceeds to go on and write a fuming email about taking the picture/story off, because it's sick and she'd been offended. Oh, the irony... Only minutes before was she laughing at other people's mishaps and maimings...

Rory 02/09/07 11:57 am

I' just disappointed you're not selling those anymore. It was a link to buy a t-shirt of a young girl playing with herself that first got me onto this site.

LimpyMcFatso 02/09/07 1:36 pm

Thank you, jacky, for notifying me that Valium now comes in packs. And as for this idiot above, Listen: there's always gonna be some asscunt who can't realize that everything is gonna be SOMEONE's thing-that-went-too-far. Intelligent people (like myself, and from what i hear the Archbishop of Canterbury, Jesus, and pedophiles) can realize this beforehand and not pretend that we are the only people in the world whose emotions should matter. More succinctly: SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Meats 02/09/07 2:36 pm

Hey AFitch! I love your store, the clothes you sell, and all of those murals of half naked chicks scattered about. I used to go in there just to look at the chick pictures (by used to I mean I got booted for leaving a stain on one of them). But I can't stand those pictures of all the half naked men everywhere. They really offend me being a guy and all. All of the A

dawgbone 02/09/07 2:47 pm

I like pie!

Meats 02/09/07 2:57 pm

(Sorry got cut off) All of the Abercrombies (the ones I'm still allowed in) won't be seeing me until they remove all of the male posters from their walls and I receive a written apology from Mr. Abercrombie. I won't make my quarterly trip there and spend that twenty bucks on that one t-shirt I buy. That comes out to eighty bucks a year! A substantial dent in their revenue. Maybe enough to bring about the downfall of the A&F empire. Sounds retarded huh? Well it is. People like Kristy were actually bullshitted by someone in their younger years to believe that everyone's opinion matters. Your one in five million voice will be heard. But if it werent for people like you, I would actually have to work while I'm at work. There would be no hate mail and/or comments section (which just made the best thing in the world even better!) So keep on keepin' on everybody. You're bickering sustains me. (P.S. I will shop at A&F again if they stop using such old looking male models. Most of these guys look like they could be in their teens!)

Dave the Brave 02/09/07 3:14 pm

I tried to purchase I Swear I Didn't Know She Was 3 during the warehouse sale, but after the purchase went through, I was informed that they'd counted stock wrong, and I got nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. I was very sad, and had to find real child porn.

Big John 02/10/07 4:13 am

The Editors Note is just fucking funny. I mean really. I almost pissed myself, mostly because I had to piss already, but the fact remains i love you. unless you're a guy, then you're cool with a really good sense of humor. Ever fed a human corpse to a hog? Easy disposal. You're fucking funny. I'm even thinking about misspelling sumthing so you can make fun of me. Got to go feed the hogs now...

I Like Cock 02/10/07 4:32 pm

Im sick of people getting so bitchy over t-shirts involving who one decides to rape. Whether its a baby or some girl who just plain asked for it wearing that skirt right in front of someone with an erect penis. If something has an oraface big enough on its person (or animal. I dont discriminate), I think men should reserve the right to stick their cocks in it. Now some may call that insenstive and I may get criticized mostly by stupid cunts with nothing better to do because their husbands wont even look at their wrinkled vaginas anymore, but hear me out. I am both fifteen years old (meaning yes, you're a pedophile) AND I have a vagina of my own so I feel that if I, an underage girl with a tight pussy, feels this way then up-tight, sexually repressed women like Kristy need to shut the fuck up.

PrincessSunshine!!!! 02/10/07 6:38 pm

bitch punctuated that incorrectly.

Skeet Rag? 02/10/07 8:50 pm

Wy do pepole even say "I'm all for freedom of speech" and "I don't USUALLY care"? It makes no fucking sense. If you are all for freedom of speech then you would just shut the fuck up. (ironic?) Anyway, people love these shirts and just because one retard, or even a regualar sized schoolbus full of retards want a shirt taken down, does not mean its gonna happen. I don't know why they even write in, but I don't mind because who am I gonna read about in each Thingy?

Beckn4devils 02/10/07 10:44 pm

I ass-raped your Mom last night, that bitch is getting loose! You'd think she'd tighten up when I double-fisted her, but hell no! She cried for more, or maybe she was crying stop! I couldn't really tell through my laughter!

Jwolf 02/10/07 11:07 pm

I agree with Skeet. The worst fuckers are the ones who say they're cool with the stuff and then say "but this one's fucked up". You're just trying to make people hate you less, and guess what. IT'S NOT WORKING JACKASS. Fuck all of you who say that anything is wrong with these shirts. They give the world the kick in the balls that it needs.

Faust 02/11/07 9:52 am

You know, I'm all for the freedom of speech, but dumb cunts like that make me question my allegiance to that particular freedom. Of course, then again maybe it isn't what she is saying, it is just that her mouth is open at all. You know I get offended by these t-shirts too bitch, but you don't hear me complaining. I mean for example, I was horrified that Saddam's t-shirt "Well Hung" wasn't nearly as graphic as it should have been. Well, I guess I'm too old fashioned for these neo-dumbshits.

Giggles McFee 02/11/07 12:55 pm

you guys are fucking amazing! sometimes, this justs throws shit into perspective so well, when I'm feeling really depressed. keep it up!

Soap 02/11/07 5:39 pm

It's funny how so many people try an imitate the editor. Find your own fucking path of humor you senseless bitches. This dude already got shat all over by a fairly creative person, no one needs to hear the same shit again, but second rate. That's like going to Outback then eating from a dumpster 'cause you thought it would be just as delicious. Well now that I think about it, it would be just as delicious. Those sneaky Aussie's...

karen riggs 02/11/07 6:37 pm

I can't believe that Snickers had to take off one of their funniest commercials yet b/c some fags got freakin' offended; thier gayness freakin' offends me!!!

Matt 02/14/07 10:37 am

yea im sure those shirts hit you the wrong way just like that pedophile hit you the wrong way when you were 3.

jordan 02/14/07 5:30 pm

do we have a different editor responding to these emails? the OOMPH is't there anymore

Rock$tar 02/14/07 9:45 pm

this site is here for entertainment if you don't like the jokes then fuck off and quit complaining

Str8_Ridah 02/15/07 4:46 pm

oh yeah i would wear your shirts. NOt cause they may offend people but cause their for people who dont know how to dress and just wanna wear a t shirt to shock people. Allright but if u wanna wear it fine, but trust me yall be lookin like some bitches. Hahaha, im pretty sure theres something that offends everyone, and if you act like there isn't you FAKE AS SHIT, be a normal ass Person.

I Like Cock 02/20/07 5:35 pm

Just a thought but why do people like Str8_Ridah get the newsletter if they dont even like the shirts?

jealous 02/21/07 11:49 am

I would give anything to have your snappy comebacks in MY head...sure, your shit is in poor taste--that's why we come to this site. So, to say that anything is offensive is retarded. It's all offensive and that's WHY we have it bookmarked. God, I hate people...Keep up the good work and keep offending us-we are dumb. :)

Nate 03/01/07 1:07 pm

I have to say, most of you that are putting comments on here are fucking idiots. Someone writes a hate mail to the site giving their opinion (expressing their freedom of speech) and you think for some reason that they are an idiot because they get offended buy a shirt. I agree with donovan when he says that if there is a t-shirt that offends him he just moves on to the next one, and Elskan, who I think was trying to say that if you are offended by a shirt the then best way to protest it would be to not buy it. All the rest of you idiots need to shut the fuck up! If you are supporting the site on the premise of freedom of speech you need to realize that you can't condemn someone else for exercising that same freedom.

Tanya 03/15/07 1:53 am

"People seem to think that our shirts create pedophiles and rapists. These people already exist. We just give them something funny to wear." Fucking brilliant, I love it.

If This Was Spanish, It'd Be 'The Endo' ... And It Would Smell Funny

You can't have your cake and eat it too. Unless you don't care what the cake looks like and you have bulimia.

Peace

Back to the Archive