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GIVE 'EM HELL!
Here's the best way to piss off all those God-fearing Seppos who are taking over the Earth...

PROUDLY RESPONSIBLE for the most outrageous T-shirts on the planet, the Yankee lads behind T-shirt Hell will go to the dark side with smiles on their dials. And mounting death threats. FHM enquired...

Tell us about T-shirt Hell.
My name’s Aaron Schwarz and I’m the President and owner. www.tshirthell.com was launched in 1975 and at first sales were slow. Once the internet was created, they picked up dramatically.

Where on earth do you get the slogan ideas?
I’m responsible for most. We also have a staff of midget hookers, falafel vendors, retarded children, monkeys, and other deviants locked in the basement, chained to typewriters 18 hours a day.

Tell us about the knob that took offence and tried to poison you.
While I do average several death threats a week, this was the first actual brush with death. The next closest call was when I reached across Oprah’s plate at a charity dinner to grab the salt. She almost bit my arm off. The whole poisoning incident is still under investigation. The police have brought in several knobs for questioning. All up, we’ve received more than 20 cease-and-desist letters from various civic groups, corporations and celebrities. We recently received one from the Olsen Twins.

Does the business make you much moolah?
We’re making so much money we’re burning some of it to heat our factory...

I Fucked The Olsen Twins Before They Were Famous

High On Life and Glue!

I Beat Cancer (By Cancer I Mean Children)

Only The Good Die Young

Abortions Tickle

Michael Jackson Did Not Molest Those Children... He Made Love To Them

He Loves The Cock

I Only Support Gay Marriage If Both Chicks Are Hot

I'm Not Getting Jiggy I Have Parkinson's

Ribbed For Her Pleasure