Fuck You You Just Won A Free Shirt Contest
date
On Oct 16 2021, T-Shirt Hell's 20th anniversary, 20 classic designs were officially retired from our site and turned into NFTs.

19 of the designs represent the most controversial and iconic shirts in our history (Worse Than Hell shirts). While the other design was the very first shirt on tshirthell.com on October 16th 2001: "SKU A01: I Fucked The Girl In Hanson". We've sold over 2 million shirts since.

Retired T-Shirt Hell NFTs represent a chance to own a piece of politically incorrect history.

These shirts are part of the lore that was early Web 2.0, when getting cancelled for making absurd social commentary jokes wasn't even a possibility.

All 20 designs will never again appear on T-Shirt Hell, but they will continue to live forever on the blockchain.

Each Retired T-Shirt Hell NFT comes with unlockable high res art of the original design and an agreement granting the wallet/owner rights to reproduce or sell the design in any way they choose for the duration they own the NFT. Rights are transferred to any future wallet if the NFT is traded to a new holder unless both parties establish a different agreement.

And, remember our classic newsletters back in the 2000's featuring the absurd amount of hate mail we received? We are also granting NFT holders, and only NFT holders, secret access to the newsletter/hate mail archives.

Re-live the moments in our history when telling people who've told us to go fuck ourselves to go fuck THEMselves didn't result in your website being removed from the internet.

Our Retired Shirts NFT Auction lasts for 6 days, 6 hours, 6 minutes beginning on Monday October 18th at noon PST, ending at 6:06pm PST on Sunday, October 24th. Bidding starts at 0.666 ETH per design.

If you have any questions, please email us at [email protected].

A snapshot of T-Shirt Hell press (all organic) from the 2000's:

https://www.tshirthell.com/press.shtml

Fans, celebs, and aliens from our classic "T-Shirt Wearing Whore" contest:

https://www.tshirthell.com/whores.shtml

A collage of TSH fans wearing the 20 shirts being retired:

T-Shirt Hell Fans wearing our shirts

TShirtHell's 20th Anniversary, Retired T-Shirt NFT Auction

6 Days, 6 Hours, 6 Minutes -- Auction ends Sunday, October 24th at 6:06 pm PST.



Our Full Collection On OpenSea: HERE

It makes perfect sense that the first shirt from what would soon become the internet's most controversial clothing company has "fuck" in the slogan.

Here is Playboy showcasing the shirt:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_playboy_2.htm

And we're pretty sure this picture submitted in 2002 is actually the girl in Hanson:

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/contestpics/a01_005.jpg

While this was not the first shirt released on T-Shirt Hell, it WAS the first shirt we released years prior when we were doing Freakfarm.com. Ivan came up with the idea and our friend Jeff, from Fugly (much more traffic than we had at the time), agreed to sell it on his site. When we began to sell over 10 shirts a day, T-Shirt Hell was conceived.

We launched on 10/16/2001 and sold 129 shirts the first day. 20 years and over 2 million shirt sales later, T-Shirt Hell still exists!

Even though this moment was bitter sweet, here was the King of all Media discussing some of our most infamous shirts:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_stern_2.htm

For those who have inquired, yes that is Harrison Ford in the silhouette. He's the bed.

May The Horse Be With You isn't exactly the kind of shirt you'd see worn on a character in a network TV show or featured in Maxim. But we did get mentioned in Maxim for a different shirt that involved a female celebrity who is currently BIG into NFTs:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_maxim.htm

Our most controversial and iconic shirt of all time. Too soon? We did wait 6 months which was like an eternity in terrorist activity time. We consider I Plane NY, School Shootings Tour, and Arrest Black Babies Before They Become Criminals to be our 3 most iconic, controversial, loved, hated, kinda liked, sorta disliked, shirts from our history.

Here's I Plane NY featured in Bizarre Magazine (the craziest magazine in the UK back in the day) in 2003:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_bizarre.htm

To be fair, the age of consent way back then was 5, so it's not THAT terrible. Oh! Here is some dude getting R. Kelly to take a picture with him while wearing the shirt, that sly bastard:

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/contestpics/a189_001.jpg

Is it a feather duster? A bouquet of flowers? Neither. And we're not going to reveal what it actually is or what it's used for, but it's totally better than all that other shit he did.

Here is an article in Zoo Magazine (one of Australia's top magazines at the time) featuring the What About All The Good Things shirt. The piece also mentions Aaron, AKA Sunshine Megatron (our creator and owner until 2012) being targeted based on the kind of shirts T-Shirt Hell was known for:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_zoo.htm

Most TSH fans don't realize that Mika, who has been with T-Shirt Hell from it's inception to this very day, is an accomplished Cellist. She actually used to play for us while we printed this shirt.

We promise that even though she looked like she could be, Mika was not an illegal child laborer. Here she is in 2002 featured on T-Shirt Hell's splash page (she's on the left, not in the middle. The one in the middle WAS an illegal child laborer (RIP one of our biggest fans, Thom Gabaldon):

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/newlogo.jpg

You're probably trying to figure out who this shirt is referencing. We still have no idea.

Here's a mention in Esquire magazine of T-Shirt Hell being the go to clothing company worn by the "who's who in the music business":

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_esquire.htm

Why do all the best things in life eventually get cancelled or disappear? Who doesn't want to just go back to the good old days when stubby, cigarette smoking, female soldiers torturing middle eastern prisoners was considered totally hot? I mean they've even outlawed waterboarding, which is one of the sexiest forms of torture there is.

Here is a 2000s T-Shirt Hell stan who was probably totally into torture back then. We have no clue who he is but we heard he's a major player in NFTs/Web 3.0. We think his name is Steve? Doug? Blark?

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/a341_013.jpg

We got a lot of shit for this one, including a cease and desist from the Olsen Twins. Here is the NY Post, Page Six article about us and our totally serious press release response to the situation:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_nypost_2.htm

Arrest Black Babies is obviously absurd social commentary meant to subversively challenge actual racist's moral thresholds for being racist. But, it's also easily the shirt that garnered the most hate mail in our history. The bigger issue is that word spread that it actually said "Kill Black Babies Before They Become Criminals". Can you imagine if a t-shirt company made a shirt that said THAT?

Not a lot of publications would even touch this shirt, but of course Russia did!

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_playboyrus.htm

In case you haven't heard, 10,000 LGBTQ John Deere employees went on strike last week. They were offended that John Deere was never able to get us to take this shirt down, no matter how many cease and desists they sent us.

Here we are featured in Instinct Magazine, one of the top gay men's publications of all time. We had a huge LBGTQ following in the 2000s. In fact we estimate over 90% of our customers were LBGTQ:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_instinct.htm

Sometimes a shirt not only holds social commentary value, it was also created simply to be shocking. And when the Mom who works at your printing facility, who just happens to have 2 kids in the military, "gets it" (and isn't remotely offended), we know we'll get into heaven when all is said and done. Hi Susan!

We support the troops. In fact our "Soldiers Need Hummers - Please Help Support The Cause" shirt proves it. Here is Slash on Leno wearing said shirt. Slash was a big TSH fan:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_tonight_2.htm

She was fucking immaculate down there.

On a serious note: it was pretty crazy back in the early 2000s when we were suddenly being featured in magazines, on radio, TV, etc. For instance, we still can't figure out how we were in Elle Girl Magazine. I mean, they did show our tame shirts, but didn't they happen to notice all the other shirts, such as Mary Was Only A Virgin If You Don't Count Anal?

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_ellegirl.htm

We don't believe it's a coincidence that T-Shirt Hell's 20th Anniversary happens to coincide with Mickey D's 40th Anniversary of the McRib sandwich. We can only hope to be around in 20 years and continue to be as healthy, and totally as NOT disgusting as the McRib is today.

Speaking of McRib, here is a picture of one of our favorite musicians, Robert Smith from the Cure, wearing a completely different T-Shirt Hell shirt:

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/contestpics/a28_002.jpg

Look, we love rap. TRUST US. Seriously, we're not just saying that. Come on.

For instance, our favorite rappers of all time are Lil Pump, Lil Nas X, Lil Uzi Vert, Lil Yachty, Lil Kim, Lil Durk, Lil TJay, Lil' Kleine, Lil Jon, Lil Peep, Lil Xan, Lil Skies, Lil Baby, LiL Ronnie, Lil' Mo, Lil' Troy, Lil' Flip, Lil Wyte, Lil Rob, Lily Allen, Lil' Will, Lil Bibby, lil aaron, Lil Scrappy, Lil Keke, Lil Reese, Lil Mama, Lil Tracy, Lil Snupe, Lil Deuce Deuce, Lil Silva, Lil' C, Lil Silvio, Lil Supa, Lil Debbie, Lil Cuete, Lil Blood, Lil Boom, Lil Trey, Lil Trill, Lil Lonnie, Lil' Cease, Lil' Chriiz, Lil Happy Lil Sad, Lil Smoke, Lil B, Lil Pete, Lil Rick, Lil' Jay, Lil Kesh, Lil Yase, LIL PHAG, Lil' Fame, Lil Windex, Lil' John, Lil Suzy, Lil Rain, Lil Bo Weep, Lil Mouse, Lil Phat, Lil Mosey, Lily Collins, Lil Fetti Boi, Lil Duke, Lil Cray, Lil Dread Fdg, and Lil Santana.

One of our employees even slept with Foxy Brown once, so that proves we love rap!

Here's a fan wearing the shirt posing with Jay-Z. Wait, is this Tupac? Oh no, Tupac wasn't still alive. Cam'ron? Maybe it's Biz Markie? Is Kevin Federline black? Because it might be Kevin Federline. We don't really know but it seems like an important rapper of some kind:

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/contestpics/a535_011.jpg

Santa Claus is a representation of Satan. The Earth is flat. The Super Bowl is secretly called The Superb Owl at Bohemian Grove and is symbolic of something unheard of. Lucille Ball’s middle name is Desiree and she married someone named Desi. Old people eating at restaurants while not talking to each other are simply communicating telepathically and we just don't realize it. Pac-Man, the most popular game in the 80’s seems to be a metaphor for taking pills (drugs) at the time and then trying to avoid ghosts who appear only because of taking the pills. Age is subjective.

In honor of youngsters who were thrusting in Hollywood life at an early age, and specifically in honor of those who no longer are under control of the system that put them and kept them there, here is a Britney shirt from 2004 mentioned in one of the largest US magazines:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_usweekly.htm

This is probably the most in your face slogan we ever put on a T-Shirt Hell t-shirt.

Get it?

On your face slogan? All over your face slogan? All over your face and I promise I won't get it in your eye slogan?

Does anyone remember when The Osbourne Family lifted a different T-Shirt Hell slogan and put it on their own Hot Topic shirt? Those were the days. I promise I did not get it in Kelly's eye:

https://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/press/press_osbournes.htm

Suicide is not the answer. If you’re experiencing thoughts of suicide, go to the hospital immediately if it’s more than just thoughts. If you have a plan in place for a suicide, or you’ve acquired the means to complete a suicide, you must call 911 immediately. Or reach out to a loved one and tell them what’s going on—they will likely intervene and bring you to the hospital. You can also call your therapist or psychiatrist, if you have one, and they will help you. The National Suicide Prevention Hotline is also available 24/7 at 1-800-273-8255.

I'm not going to defend this iconic T-Shirt Hell shirt, I'm going to show you one of the top 5 drummers in rock history wearing it!

https://www.tshirthell.com/images/contestpics/a974_004.jpg